FINDING THEIR PLACE. Chief Dull Knife College students Angie Bearquiver, Jennie Bearquiver, and Edwin Jones collect sediment samples from the Tongue River. Photo by Bob Madsen

I never thought I could succeed in college.

This is a short story of who I am, where I came from, my college experience, and the issues I encountered funding my college education. I am an enrolled Northern Cheyenne. I graduated from Chief Dull Knife College (CDKC) in May 2011 with an associate’s degree. I was on the President’s List four semesters and on the Dean’s List one semester. Currently I’m enrolled at CDKC to take courses that will be applicable to my four-year program.

My journey to college was a long one. In my youth, I was unruly and incorrigible. I did not care for school and dropped out halfway through ninth grade. During the next couple of years, I did what I thought all young Native men did: I did what I wanted, when I wanted. I worked as a ranch hand, built fences, and pumped gas for a while. Heck, what did I know? I was young and didn’t have a thought or care for the future.

In 1981, I enlisted in the U.S. Army. There, I enrolled in an educational savings plan. When I put in one dollar, they matched it with two. I wanted to attend the Phoenix Motorcycle Institute, a trade school. When I found out that the government would not pay for trade schools, I took all my money out and invested in the first passion of my life, motorcycles. I bought a Honda and was happy. What did I need college for?

Fast forward 30 years. Now I’m the single parent of a 10-year old daughter. Due to some bad decisions on my part, I lost a good paying job at the power plant. I worked construction again and did a few menial, minimum wage jobs. I was full of fear and pessimism. How was I going to take care of my daughter and home? Thank God my aunt stepped in and suggested I go to school. I thought, “What do I have to lose?” Everything if I fail.

There I was, 45 years old, and I’d never even finished ninth grade. I did get a GED in the Army, but that was nearly 25 years ago. I filled out the paperwork, took the tests, and entered school. Maybe because of my age (48) and maturity, I do well. I have a 3.8 GPA. I’ve found out that I like science.

The dreaded part of most any college student’s life (besides grades) is funding. For me, it is a tough learning curve. I have to always keep in mind that there are deadlines to meet and academic requirements to uphold. I constantly live in fear that I will mess something up or something will get messed up, putting my funding in jeopardy. This has happened, due to no fault of my own, throughout the process of applying for and receiving PELL grants, Tribal Ed money, and scholarships.

If I hadn’t gotten up and put my work boots on every morning for the last 30 years, I might have given up. Because of my grades and work ethic I have found a niche in the science department at CDKC, where I work as a research intern. Is it secure? Nothing is secure, not even in a real job. But for now, for me, it works.

What are my plans for the future? Honestly, just to survive. I had an opportunity for making big money and blew it. Today I believe that Creator has something greater in store for me. All I have to do is quit doing what I want (sound familiar?) and put my faith in Him for I know he’ll take care of me if I just have faith.

School is hard for so many young people. I feel I need to do whatever I can to help others make it through school. Whether it’s telling my story or giving advice, I’ll always help the younger generation. I wish there had been somebody telling me to stay in school. From my daughter to younger people I don’t know, I hope they never have to walk the road I did because I chose not to stay in school when I was a younger man.

Edwin Jones is a student at Chief Dull Knife College in Lame Deer, MT.